I was so inspired by the below poem and website this morning that I felt inspired to sit down at my laptop. It is an awesome inspiring blog. I thought about the question the writer asked ‘What legacy will you leave for your future generations?” Please read below and please do visit their blog. It is truly amazing:
The Story of Your Life
When your life’s story is written…
what will finally be said?
Will it be a story of good…
or a story filled with dread?
What legacy will you leave…
for your future generations?
Will it be of abuse and pain…
or God’s blessings and restorations?
Will it emphasize the struggles of life…
or the good of God’s creations?
For we can focus on the negative
with anger and frustration…
Or we can refocus on God’s blessings…
for He is our Foundation.
So think about your legacy…
that you will leave behind.
And I pray that it is good…
and God’s blessings you will find.
For we need to overcome this world…
and God is truly the Key.
So reach out to Him…
and let Him lead your legacy.
© Secret Angel and The Abuse Expose’ with Secret Angel, 2014.
I want to start by going back in time a few months by sharing how I have arrived at today and why I believe in secret angels and leaving a legacy. I was blessed this past year to write for a little while alongside a beautiful lady who has inspired me more than I think even she knows. I know in my heart as I have shared with her before “God Sent Me You”. She is an author and even though we have never physically met, she is a friend and a mentor. She asked me to share my writing at an online forum through one of the many social media sites and it was a very rewarding and life changing experience. I thank God for all of the writers and the readers there. I’m sure they do not realize how their encouragement and sharing their own hearts helped me to walk through and remove the cobwebs of emotional and verbal abuse that I had been living in for years.
Little by little, each strand of the cobwebs that had me trapped have been pulled away and I am beginning to emerge on the other side of it all.
Today, I still have tears and regret from choices made when I was in an unhealthy place physically and emotionally, yet I know that like the Israelite’s and captives held in the days of Babylon, God’s hand of blessing has been upon me. I am at a safe place, a place of love and acceptance now. I see so many things that I didn’t see before, including why my recovery has stopped and started again many times.
I have come to see that my belief in me has been a block to my healing. I held the belief that I was not worthy and because of that belief system, it kept me entangled and held down. Fear also held me down.
Just this week in working another recovery principle of Celebrate Recovery ( a wonderful ministry), and reading about hope, that I saw why that light was only a glimmer. God has been there all along. He has never left my side even as I have felt very much alone and isolated. He has been loving and patient as a Father is. I believe he does not force us to see things until we are ready. So this week, I finally am ready to embrace ‘hope’. Not because God hasn’t been there holding it out to me all along and possibly other people have been as well, but because I have felt like a failure and a burden to those same people, namely my Father and my children I couldn’t see it before.
Okay to be honest here, I have felt that I have been a burden to most everyone in my sphere, even those who have just looked at me in passing. I see that instead of wearing the banner of love, that I thought I was wearing, I was wearing the sign that said “I DON’T BELIEVE IN ME, WHY SHOULD YOU BELIEVE?” I have been walking around feeling that I am a horrible person because others in my past have said those words to and about me.
I have learned and now believe that what others say to you and about you, does not and I repeat ‘DOES NOT’ define you.
Why do we allow others to erode our belief in ourselves? I know that I am a people pleaser to a fault. I am learning that my validation should come from one source and that source is God. Yet, I have always been a people-pleaser and take their burdens on as my own. I literally cry when I know someone is in pain, although I may not even know them personally. It frustrates and confuses me why I feel so strongly for others that I don’t even know.
I am no longer embarrassed about this. I have come to see that is what God has shown me to do. He has placed this on my heart as an opportunity to pray for others. I can see now that it is a gift from God.
I now am beginning to believe in me. I know God has a purpose for my life. I’m not entirely sure what that is but I believe in my heart it is about shining His Light through my Life, even in the most unhappy moments of my life.
Yes, I do believe that we are meant to share our stories, even the sad and lonely chapters. I believe we are to turn those desert moments into our ministry to help others.
There is one more thing that I am certain of and this brings me so much hope: that God sends ‘secret angel’s’ to our lives in many forms, to help us when we can not help ourselves or to teach us something. I believe in God’s infinite wisdom each story is intended to be shared.
I do want my story to be about hope. I do hope that my story will point others to God. I know I am broken, well maybe just bent, yet I know that I am a survivor and an over-comer.
My Mother used to tell me that I had more determination than anyone she knew. I am thankful to be reminded of Mom’s words, because her words give me hope as does God’s word.
Thank you God for your many blessings upon my life. Thank you for the people you have strategically placed in my path to touch and inspire me. I will continue sharing my story in the hope, yes the word ‘HOPE’, that I can some day, in some way inspire others to write and share their stories as well.
Keep “PRESSING ON”!