As I sit and write today, which by the way has been one of the most amazing days of 2014, I feel a sense of peace wash over me.Why? Because I have shared with the readers of my blog and sharing and communication is so important to me. Why? Because, just over a year ago, after years of emotional abuse, I had secluded my heart and life and sharing away. Progress~~~
I had no idea that cutting the vines away from my heart and life would be so hard. My thought was, I was finally going to be single and life would be rosy. Nope. Didn’t happen – yet –I am safe now! I am blessed!
Do you know why else today was so special? Today is the day that I selected as the day to let the “hurt from the past” wash over me and simply let it – go! When today is over – it is over and tomorrow is a new day and a New Year! There is no need for me to hurt and cry for the past anymore. I have learned from it. I have grown in spite of it and because of it. There are moments I will cherish for always – but I am excited about the future. That is a first in and of itself after a very long time!
There were years that I couldn’t find anything to be really excited about. Oh, I had 3 beautiful reasons, my children – but the joy wasn’t there in my heart or at least it felt walled off. I know today that part of me had shut down in order to go into ‘auto-pilot’ survival mode. Feeling was subdued and squelched daily from insults and jabs and then from my own internal negative dialogue.
I had no idea that one suffered from PTSD after put-downs and innuendo. I learned that this year. I suppose I thought I was superwoman. Nope – not even close and you know what else? I don’t believe in super hero’s anymore. I believe we all have gifts and abilities and human frailties but what I do believe in is a wonderful super supreme God, who I completely surrender to!
I’m okay now with not knowing all of the ‘whys’ and ‘why nots’ of this life. I’m okay now with not understanding how others might or might not understand my journey. I will not cry that they do not anymore. I will pray that some day God enlightens them but if that is not His will – then that is okay too! Each of us has a journey. Our path is our path!
Another amazing reason for my joy and excitement today is that today I went ‘Live’ with my new biz venture. No, the idea was not mine. I am convinced God gave me the idea a year ago and so HE is going to receive all of the glory!
God has sent to my life the most amazing people at just the perfect times. I know that our paths cross on purpose. That’s exciting isn’t it? We have opportunities to meet some amazing people along the way. That’s why I will start something else new going into 2015. Last year I would end my posts with ‘pressing on’ or ‘press on’. I will still be pressing on for sure but now I will end my posts with – You have an amazing story – have you shared YOURS today?
So have you?
Thank you to everyone that has taken time from their busy lives to stop here at ‘Pressing On’ to read something that I have written. I thank those of you that have taken an extra moment to share and interact with me. I am truly honored by your presence. I look forward in interacting more and more and with more of YOU. I look forward to information sharing and I look forward – to looking forward!
God bless you! Happy New Year (almost) – See you Next Year!
So did you? Did you share YOUR story with someone today? I hope so…if not – don’t wait! God writes the most amazing stories – our lives and I believe HE wants us to share them….now let’s go and enjoy and share the pages of our lives this next year and I hope we can do that together!
Bye for now…..Go – now – SHARE YOUR STORY! (no – it’s not an order – just a gentle reminder!) You matter!